My Top Ten Books from 2014

-I don't think any of these books came out in 2014, but these are my top 10 out of the 62 books I read last year.

My Top 10 Books from 2014!
1) Happily Ever After: Walking with Peace and Courage Through a Year of Divorce-Kristin Armstrong--This is by far the book that ministered to me the most while I was going through my divorce.  So much so, that I have bought it for other friends going through the same thing.

2) You Learn by Living: Eleven Keys for a more Fulfilling Life-Eleanor Roosevelt--A friend was reading this book and bought a copy for me so we could read it together.  We read it in January and it was an awesome book to start my year off with.  Eleanor inspires people with her words and in the way she lived her life.  She was an incredible woman.

3) Courage and Consequence: My Life as a Conservative in the Fight-Karl Rove--Rove is an amazing man on so many levels.  I thoroughly enjoyed learning more about him in his candid book and about what went on in the Bush Administration.

4) Chasing the Devil: My Twenty-Year Quest to Capture the Green River Killer-David Reichert--Reichert is a man who never gave up on finding the Green River Killer (who turned out to be Gary Ridgeway) and thus bringing some measure of justice and closure for all the victims' loved ones.  This was an inspirational story on not giving up on a just cause.

5) Lone Survivor: The Eyewitness Account of Operation Redwing and the Lost Heroes of SEAL Team 10-Marcus Luttrell--The book and the movie about this true story made both of my Top 10 lists.  An incredible story about some amazing men, true heroes indeed.

6) Smokin' Seventeen-Janet Evanovich--No top 10 list is complete without a Stephanie Plum book on it.  Evanovich's series on Stephanie Plum makes me laugh out loud, reader beware if you are reading this in a public waiting room, people will think you are crazy.

7) Sleepers-Lorenzo Carcaterra--I saw the movie about this years ago and didn't realize it was based on a true story.  I found the book in a thrift store and ended up reading it right away and not being able to put it down.

8) Escape-Carolyn Jessop--This is the book that started all of my research on the FLDS and the many brave women and men who escaped the FLDS's clutches.

9) Frances Folsom Cleveland-Susan Sinnott--I found all the first ladies that I read about this year to be fascinating, but I especially loved learning about Frances because I didn't know much about her and there were a lot of firsts for her and her husband in the White House.

10) Harriet Tubman: The Moses of Her People-Sarah Bradford--A wonderful book about an amazing woman.

Studying the FLDS (Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints) Cult

The above photo is Flora Jessop with her sister Ruby Jessop.  Flora had worked for many years to help Ruby escape, and they were finally successful.

--Since, I watch a lot of true crime shows, I started seeing shows about the horrific abuses in the polygamous FLDS cult years ago.  Every time I would see a show, I would write down the books and authors that were mentioned on the show.

--Recently, I started reading one of the books and I was hooked and wanted to learn more.  So far, I have read the following books and done posts on them:

1) Escape--Carolyn Jessop
2) Triumph--Carolyn Jessop
3) Church of Lies--Flora Jessop

--I am in the middle of reading:

4) The Witness Wore Red--Rebecca Musser
5) When Men Become Gods--Stephen Singular

--On my list to read:

6) Stolen Innocence--Elissa Wall
7) Lost Boy--Brent W. Jeffs
8) The Polygamists: A History of Colorado City, Arizona--Benjamin Bistline

 
--As I've learned more, especially after reading Flora Jessop's book, I wanted to see some of the people I was reading about.  So, I found some good documentaries online.

--When I'm finished with all of the books, and when I'm done researching, I will do a comprehensive post on the FLDS. 

 
--It is important to educate people about what is going on.  As I was talking about this at work, a friend just assumed I was talking about a group in a third world country.  I said, no, this is going on right here in the U.S.

Resources:
-Rebecca Musser: Choose to be Free
-Child Protection Project
-The Hope Organization

Church of Lies--A Review

It's amusing how many people now want to take credit for the fall of Warren Jeffs.  It's a seductive story.  Everybody wants to be seen as the hero...

But Flora Jessop--well, she's the real McCoy--one of the original warriors and genuine heroes.  In fact, in many ways, Flora Jessop and a childhood friend of hers from Colorado City are truly Arizona's Founding Mothers of this hard-fought, human rights revolution.  A campaign that had to overcome more than a half-century of institutionalized neglect and indifference on the part of Utah and Arizona officials before a man like Warren Jeffs could finally be brought to justice.

There are people who might dispute that claim--but I would argue that they are people who either don't really know the story or are lying to cover their own asses.--Mike Watkiss

--After reading Carolyn Jessop's two books, Escape and Triumph, about the abuse in the FLDS polygamous cult, I decided I wanted to learn more.

--Flora Jessop is Carolyn Jessop's cousin, since most of the FLDS community are related to each other.  Flora escaped long before Carolyn, while she was still a teenager.  Flora was being sexually assaulted by her father from a very young age.  She tried to escape numerous times before she was eventually successful.

--Flora's book details her early childhood, her escape from the FLDS cult and her struggle to live a normal life afterwards.  She eventually finds peace and a good life in the outside world.  It is then that she begins to help many other women and teenagers who want to escape from the FLDS as well.

--The more I learn about the FLDS cult, the more like the mob they seem.  They indoctrinate, brainwash and abuse their members in order to keep them imprisoned.  They don't want you to escape to tell the truth, so they manipulate and try to control your every move.  If you do escape, they hunt you down and try everything in their power to force you to return.

--The women that are able to escape intact, are some of the bravest and most courageous warriors I have ever seen.

--Flora Jessop is the Executive Director of The Child Protection Project, which is an amazing organization helping many escape their lives of abuse in the FLDS.

--To this day, Jessop continues to fight for victims of abuse, wherever they may be.  As Mike Watkiss says, she is one of the "original warriors and genuine heroes" of this movement.

Triumph--A Review

But if I could find the strength not to bow to an evil system, I could at least hold on to my self-respect.  
If you understand what you're doing and why, an abuser can never wholly control you.--pg. 148 of Triumph

--I have done 2 posts about Carolyn Jessop and her first book, Escape.  She is an inspirational woman of courage.  I read her first book, Escape, and couldn't put it down.  I knew I needed to read her second one, Triumph.

--It has been therapeutic to read how she escaped a life and marriage that involved emotional, verbal and physical abuse on a level that most people can't imagine.  She was indoctrinated to believe that all of the abuse was okay, and that she was evil if she wanted to stand up to it or even escape from it.

--It has helped me process my own thoughts and beliefs about how people can misuse religion to sometimes lead women into bondage and keep them there. I talk about this in my post, The Treatment of Women.

--Jessop's first book is all about her growing up in the FLDS cult and how she escaped.  Her 2nd book is about the aftermath.  She is able to take on the FLDS and win, not once, but twice.

Winning custody of my children built a bridge halfway across the ravine.  Winning child support completed the job.  I hope the landmark ruling in my case is an inspiration to all women in difficult or abusive relationships.  You can stand up to a perpetrator and win.--p. 246

--She learns how to stand on her own two feet, and find real, unconditional love.  She has inspired me and empowered me in my own life.

--Below, are some more of my favorite quotes from the book:

Within that first year of my marriage, the family saw me as an out-of-control member because I refused to submit totally to its power elite.  While this was often an uncomfortable position.  I possessed something no one else in the family had: the real power that flows from self-respect.--p. 149

Bedrock Beliefs
1) Claim the power of no
2) Set your own standards
3) Hold on to whatever power you do have
4) Forget about perfection, do the best you can
5) Do whatever it takes to protect those you love

Victimhood requires our acquiescence, and I was opting out.--p. 161

I no longer wanted to fix the people who had hurt me.  I released them all to their miserable and mean-spirited worlds.  I was setting myself free and the effort was empowering.--p. 191

I especially found her thoughts on forgiveness to be life-changing:

It's been said that desiring revenge is like swallowing poison and waiting for someone else to die.  I believe that.  It took discipline and work for me to release all the anger I felt toward Merril.  But nothing I'd ever felt compared to the relief of dumping one bad emotion after another.  Go. Goodbye. Gone.  I had no more expectations.  I no longer had to fix anything.  Once I forgave Merril, his power over me evaporated.

I talked about the liberation of forgiveness.  I explained that letting go of my anger did not mean that what had happened to me was okay.  It will never be okay, but I refuse to let the past sabotage my life or curtail my energy, purpose, and joy.  I wanted no ties to my perpetrators; forgiveness cut them all.--p. 194

--There were only 2 things that I disagreed with her on in this book.  1) She voted for Obama and talked about how wonderful that was (LOL).  But I am excited for her that got to experience the privilege of voting.

2) She has some strong views on how homeschooling should be more regulated by the government.  She thinks this would help there be less educational abuse within cults like the FLDS.  Cults don't adhere to any kinds of laws, such as marrying only one wife, sexual and physical abuse, etc...How would having more government regulations keep the FLDS in check?  I don't think it would, and as we all know, more government power grabs can lead to abuse of people by them.

--Other than that, the book was amazing.  A final quote:

In the fabric of our own lives, sometimes there are colors we don't want and threads we didn't choose, but the pattern that emerges is distinctly our own.--p. 256

Carolyn Jessop--A Portrait of Courage

--At 18 years of age, Carolyn Blackmore was forced to marry 50 year old Merril Jessop. She became his 4th wife. Even though she got violently ill with each pregnancy, and the last 4 endangered her life, she gave birth to 8 children.  One of whom had numerous medical needs, and required 24/7 care.

--She lived with abuse for 17 years. Her husband was physically, emotionally and verbally abusive.  He also manipulated his other wives to punish her for not being an "obedient wife".

--She finally became disillusioned with the FLDS and polygamy.  She started planning her escape in the year 2000, and was successful on April 21, 2003.

--She was the first woman to gain full custody of her children after leaving the FDLS community.


--Carolyn Jessop has written two books, Escape and Triumph: Life After the Cult--A Survivor's Lessons.  A movie was made based on her life, In God's Country.

--I have always known that polygamy was oppressive and abusive towards women and children, but I was horrified as I learned of Carolyn's story.  I am just flabbergasted that so many men, women and children can be brainwashed so completely.

--In the FLDS, everything in a woman's life is about pleasing and obeying her husband (her priesthood head).  It is through her husband that a woman is able to get to heaven.  So, the man's needs are not only more important than a woman's, but even more important than the children's needs.

--I was shocked to hear about how the children were sexually and physically abused and neglected.  The wives couldn't risk displeasing their husbands (because that would endanger their chance of getting into heaven), so children were often neglected as a result.

--Carolyn's ability to not only survive years of brainwashing and abuse, but to escape from it is a profile in courage.  She is a heroine for women of all walks of life.